Trying to understand women is like trying to smell the color 9.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Aug 11, 2015 #481 Trying to understand women is like trying to smell the color 9.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Aug 13, 2015 #482 No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Aug 14, 2015 #483 If I promise to miss you, will you go away?
O OTBOTOR All-Conference Aug 28, 2014 2,339 2,158 0 Aug 15, 2015 #484 A Native American guy goes to his psychiatrist and says, "Doc, ya gotta help me. I'm so conflicted. Some days I feel like a wigwam, other days I feel like a teepee." Doc says, "You need to relax. You're too tense (two tents)."
A Native American guy goes to his psychiatrist and says, "Doc, ya gotta help me. I'm so conflicted. Some days I feel like a wigwam, other days I feel like a teepee." Doc says, "You need to relax. You're too tense (two tents)."
O OTBOTOR All-Conference Aug 28, 2014 2,339 2,158 0 Aug 15, 2015 #485 1: knock knock 2: who's there? 1: Daisy 2: Daisy who? 1:
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Aug 19, 2015 #486 You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Aug 21, 2015 #487 There may be no excuse for laziness, but I'm still looking.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Aug 24, 2015 #488 A liberal is just a conservative who hasn't been mugged yet.
Hawkssox1 Sophomore May 2, 2010 11,822 150 63 Aug 25, 2015 #489 What do you have with 50 lesbians and 50 govt workers?100 people that don't do dick!!
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Aug 25, 2015 #490 I'm jealous of all the people that haven't met you!
Hawkssox1 Sophomore May 2, 2010 11,822 150 63 Aug 25, 2015 #491 DJ Spanky said: I'm jealous of all the people that haven't met you! Click to expand... I resemble that remark!!
DJ Spanky said: I'm jealous of all the people that haven't met you! Click to expand... I resemble that remark!!
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Aug 26, 2015 #492 I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up your ***. Reactions: Blitz8RU
I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up your ***.
Hawkssox1 Sophomore May 2, 2010 11,822 150 63 Aug 26, 2015 #493 DJ Spanky said: I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up your ***. Click to expand... God only knows you have been trying and it is a bit annoying.
DJ Spanky said: I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up your ***. Click to expand... God only knows you have been trying and it is a bit annoying.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Aug 28, 2015 #494 What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horse's ***? A mechanic!
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Aug 31, 2015 #495 I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 1, 2015 #496 Why do husbands die before their wives? They want to.
S SkilletHead2 All-American Sep 30, 2005 24,456 9,281 113 Sep 1, 2015 #497 You can do it, Spanky! Three more and we hit 500 replies!
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 3, 2015 #498 Don't steal: that's the government's job.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 4, 2015 #499 The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 8, 2015 #500 My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me. Reactions: Blitz8RU
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 10, 2015 #502 I'm busy right now. Can I ignore you some other time?
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 15, 2015 #503 I hate girls that complain about being single every 3 minutes. 90% of my socks are single & you don't see them crying about it.
I hate girls that complain about being single every 3 minutes. 90% of my socks are single & you don't see them crying about it.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 17, 2015 #504 My favorite mythical creature? The honest politician.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 18, 2015 #505 If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 22, 2015 #506 I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works.
M Mikemarc Heisman Nov 28, 2005 69,220 17,902 97 Sep 22, 2015 #507 Eating clocks is time consuming. But if a clock is hungry, does it go back four seconds?
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 23, 2015 #508 You're so fat, you could sell shade.
B beaced_rivals Heisman Jul 18, 2004 32,005 10,324 0 Sep 23, 2015 #509 Saw a sign at a local dry cleaners advertising French Cleaning.I think that I know how they get the clothes clean.
Saw a sign at a local dry cleaners advertising French Cleaning.I think that I know how they get the clothes clean.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 24, 2015 #510 Did Noah include termites on the ark? Reactions: Doctor Worm
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Sep 30, 2015 #511 Even people who are totally useless can bring a smile to your face, when pushed down a flight of stairs........
Even people who are totally useless can bring a smile to your face, when pushed down a flight of stairs........
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Oct 1, 2015 #512 A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Oct 5, 2015 #513 I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Oct 6, 2015 #514 Impotence: Nature's way of saying "No hard feelings".
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Oct 7, 2015 #515 I think that if I died and went straight to hell it would take me at least a week to realize I wasn't at work anymore. Reactions: Blitz8RU
I think that if I died and went straight to hell it would take me at least a week to realize I wasn't at work anymore.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Oct 8, 2015 #516 I always knew that I could never be a lawyer because of my inability to pass a bar.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Oct 9, 2015 #517 The last airline I flew charged for everything. Except for the bad service. That was free. Reactions: Blitz8RU
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Oct 12, 2015 #518 People who live in stone houses shouldn't throw glasses. That just brought to mind this:
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Oct 13, 2015 #519 Talk is cheap. Until you hire a lawyer.
DJ Spanky Heisman Jul 25, 2001 48,425 59,362 113 Oct 15, 2015 #520 The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall.
