Rank em

hawkeyetraveler

Heisman
Aug 10, 2010
5,026
20,387
108
3 over 1

2 is mayo adjacent and I believe belongs in a separate category. I like it as a spread on burgers and sandwiches, but not in things where mayo is an ingredient like salad dressings, Cole slaw, etc.

We routinely have miracle whip and dukes in the house for this reason.
 

Torbee

Heisman
Sep 13, 2002
12,236
56,949
113
al recording GIF
 
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AFM22

Heisman
Oct 31, 2022
16,961
32,427
113
Hellmann's tastes exactly like mayonnaise should. Dukes is pretty good but it has a slightly off heavier thing going on. Miracle Whip doesn't taste like mayo to me.
Right. I don't think Duke's is bad, I just prefer Hellmann's. I rank it like this
1. Hellman's
2. Duke's


3. Generic Name Mayo


















4. Literal poop









5. Miracle Whip
 

PAWrocka

Heisman
Nov 3, 2008
21,130
28,485
103
All the more reason for you Iowa f’ers need to F* off.

This was settled here YEARS ago. Wait … no no … it was never a debate to begin with.

The answer is Dukes, always Dukes. It’s the only acceptable mayo.

anyone who says Miracle Whip needs to be locked in a concentration camp.
 

noleclone2

Heisman
May 3, 2015
2,910
11,462
113
Another vote for Dukes and Miracle Whip is not a mayonnaise but is literally a dressing. This is because it replaces vegetable oil content with….water….and adds sugar
 
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JWolf74

All-Conference
Dec 17, 2022
1,423
4,474
113
Miracle Whip on a sandwich. Every time. Mayo by itself is meh on a sandwich. But it's useful in dips and other applications so I just buy the generic Hy-Vee brand.

So 2, 1, 3. M24L.
 
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JWolf74

All-Conference
Dec 17, 2022
1,423
4,474
113
OP left off the best choice (at least for sandwiches). If you have a really good mustard, preferably a honey/spicy combo, your sandwich doesn't need another condiment.
 

Outbackbowl2017

All-Conference
Dec 4, 2016
1,515
2,447
113
I prefer Hellman’s with olive oil. MW isn’t allowed in our house. We don’t buy Duke’s, don’t think it is in stores or I just haven’t looked for it. Funny story, I was driving today and saw a full bottle of MW by the curb of the street I was driving on and saw two loaves of bred nearby yesterday, not too far from today’s find. That says it all when bread and MW were thrown out of a vehicle.
 

Wobmam Rulez!

All-American
Aug 4, 2025
3,171
5,025
113
Heinz makes the best mayo I've ever had. Very similar to an aioli flavor. The problem I've run into is, Heinz is only available commercially and isn't sold in stores. If anyone can direct me to finding it being sold to the masses, I would be much appreciated (and you other mayo lovers will be, too).

Grew up eating the Whip that was far from a miracle because we were poor. We are not anymore and the Whip will no longer be found in the fridge.
 

LafayetteBear

All-American
Nov 30, 2009
33,725
8,953
113
I don't like mayonnaise. At least I don't if I can see it. Mix it in with tuna and celery to make tuna salad, and I'm OK with it. But if you just spread it on a turkey sandwich, it looks like someone just spooged on your sandwich. No thanks.