"A man I'm proud to call my friend. A man who will be the next President of the United States—Barack America!"
"I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy. I mean, that's a storybook, man."
"I promise you, the president has a big stick. I promise you."
"When the stock market crashed, Franklin D. Roosevelt got on the television and didn't just talk about the, you know, the princes of greed. He said, 'Look, here's what happened.'"
"His mom lived in Long Island for 10 years or so. God rest her soul. And—although, she's—wait—your mom's still—your mom's still alive. Your dad passed. God bless her soul."
"Look, John's last-minute economic plan does nothing to tackle the number-one job facing the middle class, and it happens to be, as Barack says, a three-letter word: jobs. J-O-B-S, jobs."
"Hillary Clinton is as qualified or more qualified than I am to be vice president of the United States of America. Quite frankly, it might have been a better pick than me."
"I guess what I'm trying to say without boring you too long at breakfast—and you all look dull as hell, I might add. The dullest audience I have ever spoken to. Just sitting there, staring at me. Pretend you like me!"
"You cannot go to a 7-11 or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent....I'm not joking."
"Stand up, Chuck, let 'em see ya." (Chuck is confined to a wheelchair)
"Folks, I can tell you I've known eight presidents, three of them intimately." [roll]