OT: Engagement Ring Spend

[KeithK7624]

I feel like this is an annual question on the board. What is the going rate for a spend on an engagement ring? I have an idea in my head but some friends say it's too much while others say it's too little. Ive read some articles and they say 3 months salary which to me is crazy. Even id I was starting at 40k year that's quite the rock.

Yes, I know this will be the worst investment of my life. Honestly just curious

 

[RobertG]

Buy a fake ring. If she tests it to find out it isn't real then you know she doesn't trust you so you don't want to marry her. If she doesn't test it then you saved yourself a good amount of cash you can use at a vegas strip club.

Win Win.

 

[RUinsane]

1) You should spend what you can afford
2) Buying engagement ring is abut value. Do your homework so you know how to tell a good one from a bad one and how to properly value them. Start with the 4 C's Cut, Color, Clarity and Carat.
3) Only buy diamonds that you can inspect loose (not in a setting).
4) You really should only buy diamonds that have a GIA certificate. GIA does blind ratings, meaning they have no idea whose diamond it is when they grade them. All the other ones are BS because the scores can be bought.

 

[Blitz8RU]

as little as possible. spend majority of your money on the wedding ring and a prenup where if you get divorced, you get the wedding ring back. Hedge your bets.

 

[PhilaPhans]

Ask yourself this ... does your future wife need a $10K ring to be happy? That extra $5-8K will go a long way for a couple killer vacations or towards a down payment on a house instead of something that she could just lose if she's not careful.

 

[RBS05]

going rate

You're going to get mostly BS responses but get these words out of your head. Get your woman something nice and pay what you can afford in cash (or put it on a CC if you can get points and will pay it off immediately). Only you know what that means. Forget about X months salary.

Whatever you do, don't finance it. If you are, you're spending too much. I have a good friend who was paying off the engagement ring 4 years into the marriage. Moronic.

 

[oldman87]

Miss the days when all you needed was a club, make marriage great again.

 

[Ole Cabbagehead]

Buy her a ring that is appropriate considering your age and position in life. If you go cheap, you are making an *** out of her. Even if "she doesn't care" everyone else will know you went cheap. If you go over the top, you are wasting your money. Don't let the salesman try to tell you its an investment. It is not. Its a consumable, and one of the most expensive consumables you will ever buy.

In any event, do not spend more than you can afford to spend in cash. If you don't have enough cash to buy an appropriate ring, its not time to get engaged yet.

My advice: Size beats quality every time. Get a stone that has no visible imperfections, and then get the biggest size you can afford. People will argue with this, but if you go under the assumption that you are going to actually marry this woman, and you will never get the stone back and try to sell it, buying a perfect or near perfect stone is a huge waste of money.

 

[Riceonthebanks]

1 Go shopping with her.
2 Go bigger on the setting. There are tons of big diamonds out there in boring settings that look like crap. The setting is what makes the stone.
3 Consider other center stones besides diamond. Diamonds are overvalued and ordinary. A great ring with a different stone will get more compliments and won't set you back as much. My wife has a tsavorite and her sister has a sapphire

 

[RU_Planning]

Propose while wearing cargo shorts.

 

[PSU_Nut_rivals17625]

Asking how much to spend a on a ring is like asking how much you should donate to charity. There will never be a consensus or right answer. You have to decide what you feel comfortable with spending. Don't feel pressured into spending to much or feel guilty for spending to much. I know there are many people on this board who would tell me I spent too much and then there will be people who say I didn't spend enough.

Go ring shopping with her and take notes of which rings she likes(size, style, cut ect.). Many women have a dream ring and then when they try it on it doesn't look right on them. Then set a budget and find a ring that fits her taste and your budget.

 

[Tango Two]

I feel like this is an annual question on the board. What is the going rate for a spend on an engagement ring? I have an idea in my head but some friends say it's too much while others say it's too little. Ive read some articles and they say 3 months salary which to me is crazy. Even id I was starting at 40k year that's quite the rock.

Yes, I know this will be the worst investment of my life. Honestly just curious

Why not spend what YOU want and not what anonymous people on a college football message board say?

 

[greenknight]

Get a puppy

 

[AntiG]

get something within your budget. You don't need to go overboard, but you certainly need to make sure its GIA certified. Quality of the stone over the size (IMO ideal cut is really most important since it allows the most light to refract, followed by clarity), as long as the size is decent. Nowadays most rings are at least 1 carat, so if you can't afford that much at least get a decent quality one so its at least beautiful. Getting a large stone that looks like crap will be worse than a smaller one that shines like nothing else.

And 40k is a bit insane unless you are loaded.

 

[beaced_rivals]

Buy her a ring that is appropriate considering your age and position in life. If you go cheap, you are making an *** out of her. Even if "she doesn't care" everyone else will know you went cheap. If you go over the top, you are wasting your money. Don't let the salesman try to tell you its an investment. It is not. Its a consumable, and one of the most expensive consumables you will ever buy.

In any event, do not spend more than you can afford to spend in cash. If you don't have enough cash to buy an appropriate ring, its not time to get engaged yet.

My advice: Size beats quality every time. Get a stone that has no visible imperfections, and then get the biggest size you can afford. People will argue with this, but if you go under the assumption that you are going to actually marry this woman, and you will never get the stone back and try to sell it, buying a perfect or near perfect stone is a huge waste of money.

Just be sure that no one gives her a Jewelers Loupe as a Wedding Gift.

 

[dollarbill]

Go to Costco for the ring. Set the tone for things to come. Great value as usual. I told my wife to get my casket there (unless you have to buy a two pack). Good luck. $$$$

 

[Leonard23]

I feel like this is an annual question on the board. What is the going rate for a spend on an engagement ring? I have an idea in my head but some friends say it's too much while others say it's too little. Ive read some articles and they say 3 months salary which to me is crazy. Even id I was starting at 40k year that's quite the rock.

Yes, I know this will be the worst investment of my life. Honestly just curious

Did she pass the Mario Test?

 

[Rokodesh]

You're going to get mostly BS responses but get these words out of your head. Get your woman something nice and pay what you can afford in cash (or put it on a CC if you can get points and will pay it off immediately). Only you know what that means. Forget about X months salary.

Whatever you do, don't finance it. If you are, you're spending too much. I have a good friend who was paying off the engagement ring 4 years into the marriage. Moronic.

hahahahahahah

no offense but he's a ****ing idiot

 

[RBNY87]

Go to the diamond district in NYC with cash. Find nice size diamond with slight imperfection that you would never know. The size of diamond is only thing you can tell with naked eye, not the 3 C's. It is jewelry, not investment. Spend what you can but you will get good value with my strategy. Don't believe any of the crap about accessing for double. If that were really true then you would sell and buy sell and buy until you have enough money.

 

[DOB6363]

Absolutely pay cash if you can. You are able to get better quality and size because of this. They're more inclined to give you a deal.

 

[Alaska_Dawg]

$1,249.00 - $1,358.22& FREE Returns.

 

[RU206]

Go to the diamond district in NYC with cash. Find nice size diamond with slight imperfection that you would never know. The size of diamond is only thing you can tell with naked eye, not the 3 C's. It is jewelry, not investment. Spend what you can but you will get good value with my strategy. Don't believe any of the crap about accessing for double. If that were really true then you would sell and buy sell and buy until you have enough money.

This. Do not go to a jewelry store. Diamond district is a must.

 

[koleszar]

Buy modest, make the engagement ring a wedding ring combo. Have a small wedding or elope. Then when you get back from a modest honeymoon, buy the house of her dreams. I did this with my wife. I bought her the farm of her dreams and she's still happy with the decision to this day.

We eliminated one of the main factors in people getting divorce from the start. Financial woes. Weddings and rings are a financial debt nobody needs in starting a blissful marriage. That is unless she really wants them, then your screwed.

 

[chrisru99]

Lots of the answers given tell you why are BIG build fund is rising at a snails pace. What an awesome group of people!!

 

[blockm2]

don't use a formula of X months salary or whatever. It should be an amount of money that requires you to save up for a couple months to afford, but not something that is going to rack up credit card debt you'll be paying for years.

If she's really the right woman, the ring won't matter, but you also don't want her to feel ashamed to show anybody.

 

[rutino]

Setting and stone size are personal choices, some girls prefer simple more delicate settings, and others want them paved in diamonds. Pay attention to your girlfriend because she most likely has been dropping you hints about the type of ring she likes lol. Buy what you can comfortably afford in cash. There are more important things in your future than spending a big chunk of money on a ring.

 

[Alaska_Dawg]

 

[mildone_rivals]

Spend no more than 1K. Use the rest for hookers and blow.

 

[RUskoolie]

Go to the diamond district in NYC with cash. Find nice size diamond with slight imperfection that you would never know. The size of diamond is only thing you can tell with naked eye, not the 3 C's. It is jewelry, not investment. Spend what you can but you will get good value with my strategy. Don't believe any of the crap about accessing for double. If that were really true then you would sell and buy sell and buy until you have enough money.

I did exactly that. People think I spent 3-4 times what I spent. Cut and clarity are extremely overrated IMO. No one walks around with a diamond magnifier to inspect the cut and clarity.

 

[Alaska_Dawg]

I did exactly that. People think I spent 3-4 times what I spent. Cut and clarity are extremely overrated IMO. No one walks around with a diamond magnifier to inspect the cut and clarity.

This ^^

 

[jmc11201]

Lots of good advice here. I'll add mine.

1. 100% agree with those saying to go for size over clarity, color, etc. All those things are just a distraction and selling tool. Maybe once or twice in my life have I ever looked at someones ring and said 'Oh, that has nice sparkle'...and it is most likely because it is big and high quality.

2. My wife's ring at this point is an accessory...an everyday item. Perhaps it has some sentimental value, but after a few days, it is just a ring. She will be more impressed...and more importantly her friends and family will be more impressed...if it is bigger rather than shinier. At the same time, I've seen some embarrassingly small and cheap rings that people say nice things about...so any ring will do to some extent.

3. As far as price, I would spend what you are comfortable with and maybe an extra grand. I've been married 11 years and looking back, I wish I had spent a few more bucks on the ring to get her something a little nicer. I would say the same with the wedding. It is a stupid, frivolous purchase, and a total rip-off, but it is one of the few things that lasts through your marriage. Assuming you have a reasonable career path, spend a few dollars more than you think you should.

 

[Caliknight]

Depending on how old you are/how much you have budgeted. I know lots of guys that got married early and skimped on the diamond. They regret it now. Extend yourself if that is the case.

If you are making good coin, I would say ~$20k will get you a decent diamond for life.

 

[Alaska_Dawg]

Depending on how old you are/how much you have budgeted. I know lots of guys that got married early and skimped on the diamond. They regret it now. Extend yourself if that is the case.

If you are making good coin, I would say ~$20k will get you a decent diamond for life.

$20 G's for a rock?

 

[blockm2]

2. My wife's ring at this point is an accessory...an everyday item. Perhaps it has some sentimental value, but after a few days, it is just a ring. She will be more impressed...and more importantly her friends and family will be more impressed...if it is bigger rather than shinier.

My only thought is that unfortunately the rest of your marriage you end up having to by other assorted jewelry that also seems overpriced. Earrings, necklaces, bracelets, etc. Spending that cash on jewelry that seems overpriced doesn't end with the engagement ring, it begins with the engagement ring.

 

[blockm2]

$20 G's for a rock?

It's all relative, not absolute. If you make $1M a year, "$20 G's for a rock" isn't much. If you make $30K a year, it's way too much. We all have different perspectives on absolute numbers, but relative it's all the same.

 

[RUSK97]

I'm almost certain the 3 months salary thing was drummed up by the diamond cartel, De Beers. What a racket. They just buy up all the jewelry-grade diamonds and store them away so they can drive up the value. Try buying a used diamond. They're worthless.

 

[Caliknight]

My only thought is that unfortunately the rest of your marriage you end up having to by other assorted jewelry that also seems overpriced. Earrings, necklaces, bracelets, etc. Spending that cash on jewelry that seems overpriced doesn't end with the engagement ring, it begins with the engagement ring.

If you don't know this far before you buy the engagement ring, you are in trouble.

 

[blockm2]

If you don't know this far before you buy the engagement ring, you are in trouble.

we are all in trouble

 

[RU848789]

Buy a fake ring. If she tests it to find out it isn't real then you know she doesn't trust you so you don't want to marry her. If she doesn't test it then you saved yourself a good amount of cash you can use at a vegas strip club.

Win Win.

Or do what I did. Asked my fiancee if she'd rather me spend $10K on an inert piece of carbon or on kick-*** wedding and honeymoon (we paid for our own for the most part). She saw the logic in that and I never had to waste money on an engagement ring. And then she was cool with putting a pool table in our living room. Now that's a keeper.

 

[higgins3]

I did exactly that. People think I spent 3-4 times what I spent. Cut and clarity are extremely overrated IMO. No one walks around with a diamond magnifier to inspect the cut and clarity.

Where did you buy the ring?Can you give the type?