Marriage...

SuperBigFan

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If you want him to suck your dong, you probably aren't a candidate to have a wife. God forbid you would have to show a modicum of decency around a woman. yeah, it is you.
But then you are not being yourself. Right? That is the point, if you have to change how you want to act, what you want to say and so on, well, then you are married to your mom. Not your best friend. Your best friend won't judge you.
 

SuperBigFan

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Dang, I was about to call the police after reading through this, there is some big time abuse going on.
 

SuperBigFan

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Jesus Tapdancing Christ there are seriously people that say their wife is their best friend?!

Sometimes I think my marriage is horrible, but that would be SO MUCH WORSE than what I’m rolling with.
Lot of dudes that gave their wife their screen name and password.

Imagine being like "Honey, I am cancelling golf with the guys today, do you want to golf with me instead or maybe we can dig holes in the backyard and plant some stuff?"

And imagine her being like "Oh, dude, can I come with when you guys go to Lincoln for the game tailgating and bar hopping sounds awesome"
 

SuperBigFan

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Where women are shamed for sleeping around while men are celebrated by other men for doing the same thing.
Yep!

I think what he was trying to get at is that women FEEL more empowered to show off, to date more dudes, stuff like that. And that is very true.

But yeah, slut shaming is basically girls bashing other girls for doing what they also do. **** we saw it in this thread...dudes bashing on girls for having sex.
 

Lincoln100

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But then you are not being yourself. Right? That is the point, if you have to change how you want to act, what you want to say and so on, well, then you are married to your mom. Not your best friend. Your best friend won't judge you.
What the? No, not right. Because you don’t get to act like a buffoon whenever you want around someone means you have to change? Best friends do judge, that is, if they are legit friends, and not just someone you like to get hammered with and making farting noises with your armpits. Peaked-in-high school guy.
 

king_kong_

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Nov 3, 2021
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there is significant research showing men get much more benefit from marriage than women

this thread is a good illustration as to why that is
 

Lincoln100

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yet still a big negative connotation to it. hence the shaming.
people throughout history had multiple wives, even god's supposed kings/prominent figures. they may have been more understanding back then.
Kind of feels like your complaint about weed not being legal everywhere. Everyone who wants to do it can do it, with little effort, but because it isn’t formally recognized as accepted by governments, there is a “negative connotation” to it, and it bothers you.
 

RedMyMind

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Kind of feels like your complaint about weed not being legal everywhere. Everyone who wants to do it can do it, with little effort, but because it isn’t formally recognized as accepted by governments, there is a “negative connotation” to it, and it bothers you.
no. cultures change and I'm just philosophizing
 

huskerfan1414

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Oct 25, 2014
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because you know which one it is.

I believe we have 2 main dichotomies in our psyche. Instinct/survival which is more of the selfish level and morality (doing the least harm), which is our altruistic side.

When survival is difficult, selfishness usually prevails. As society becomes more stable, our selfish instinct hopefully allows our altruistic nature to flourish. Being stuck in fear, which many religions use, keeps us from our potential in the latter.

Marriage has traditionally been about survival.
Speak for yourself. My faith/religion is not based on fear, and has definitely made me less selfish and far more giving.
 

Mrs.Jeans15

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May 5, 2018
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“We have no government armed with power capable of contending with human passions unbridled by morality and religion. Avarice, ambition, revenge or gallantry would break the strongest cords of our Constitution as a whale goes through a net. Our Constitution is designed only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate for any other.”

Adams


“If Men were angels, no government would be necessary. If angels were to govern men, neither external nor internal controls on government would be necessary. In framing a government which is to be administered by men over men, the great difficulty lies in this: you must first enable the government to control the governed; and the next place, oblige it to control itself.”

Madison
Yes great speech


American society doesn't care. You go on the internet and slut shame a woman amd you will be attacked.
 

Redmich

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Jun 21, 2022
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Marriage today is not what is intended to be. Marriage is between one man and one woman for life to become one flesh united to reflect God. Marriage should have God in the center of your marriage if you see it as described previously. Marriage reflects the culture of society, and society today is extremely perverse and Godless.
Marriage today is seen as a convenience and to last as long as I am happy and can be to whomever I want to hook up with. Secular marriage will seldom be successful since there are such low and in some instances zero standards. Marriage will give tax benefits and a regular bed partner.
Seems like people are taking a lot of marriage advice from a book supposedly written by a guy who was never married and his unmarried virgin son.

Have to question the credibility.
Kinda like Beth Mowens commenting on football
 

RedMyMind

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Monogamy caters much more towards women's natural instincts than men's. They would rather have all the resources being put towards them and their children vs spread across a multitude.

The problem with teaching that monogamy is natural for men is that it ultimately hurts women as well. It sets relationships up to fail and men can't be honest about how men are, so unhappiness often festers without any dialogue or understanding.

Ultimately, I don't think there is one perfect solution.
 

SuperBigFan

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What the? No, not right. Because you don’t get to act like a buffoon whenever you want around someone means you have to change? Best friends do judge, that is, if they are legit friends, and not just someone you like to get hammered with and making farting noises with your armpits. Peaked-in-high school guy.
Look at us, arguing like a married couple :)
 
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king_kong_

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97% of those studies were conduct my wives :)
no, your posts are proof positive of their conclusion

dudes want to be dudes - and the things we most want to do (get faded, smoke, bang everything in sight, play with guns/explosives, drive fast, etc.) are most detrimental to our health

also why we will never catch women in terms of overall longevity
 

SuperBigFan

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no, your posts are proof positive of their conclusion

dudes want to be dudes - and the things we most want to do (get faded, bang everything in sight, play with guns/explosives, drive fast, etc.) are most detrimental to our health
Correct, men, married, tend to live longer (even though they probably don't want to)

I would assume that married men with families probably get the most "benefit"

Also I was joking about the studies being done by wives.
 

Tetonia

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Jan 22, 2022
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There's evidence of single family dwelling units from before the last Ice Age. Whether there were ceremonies or not is anyone's guess.

There are plenty of other species that mate for life.

That said, monogamy is unnatural, and sucks.
 

Mrs.Jeans15

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May 5, 2018
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Monogamy caters much more towards women's natural instincts than men's. They would rather have all the resources being put towards them and their children vs spread across a multitude.

The problem with teaching that monogamy is natural for men is that it ultimately hurts women as well. It sets relationships up to fail and men can't be honest about how men are, so unhappiness often festers without any dialogue or understanding.

Ultimately, I don't think there is one perfect solution.
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Most men have no problem being monogamus. It is irresponsible for a man to hting a life into this world tbst they cant support 24 hours a day. Cayse tgats the result of that.

Only men with great resources ever had the oppportunity to have multiple females consistently. The top 10%

Most men can barely get one. Especially now.
 
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Jul 4, 2016
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Most men have no problem being monogamus. It is irresponsible for a man to hting a life into this world tbst they cant support 24 hours a day. Cayse tgats the result of that.

Only men with great resources ever had the oppportunity to have multiple females consistently. The top 10%

Most men can barely get one. Especially nowm
Did you have a quick stroke during that first paragraph?
 

SuperBigFan

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Jun 10, 2021
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Most men have no problem being monogamus. It is irresponsible for a man to hting a life into this world tbst they cant support 24 hours a day. Cayse tgats the result of that.

Only men with great resources ever had the oppportunity to have multiple females consistently. The top 10%

Most men can barely get one. Especially nowm
Like, 70 years ago a man would have one family in one town and another secret family a town over...and no one would know. Crazy ****!
 

SuperBigFan

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Can't do that broke.

That was real freedom when we didnt have cell phones...lol
Oh man, no kidding! I wonder how many marriages have been ****** up because of texting, snapchat and FB messenger and all that stuff. So easy for people to "start the road" of cheating.
 
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Seems like people are taking a lot of marriage advice from a book supposedly written by a guy who was never married and his unmarried virgin son.

Have to question the credibility.
Kinda like Beth Mowens commenting on football

I will attempt to make this short and simple. I wanted to avoid this part of the conversation, but marriage is a covenant with God.

Marriage as it appears in the Bible, not in modern times or in the ancient Near East and the Graeco-Roman world of biblical times.

The marriage compact is called “the covenant of God” (Prov. 2:17), because the marriage was made in God’s name. The marriage relation is used to represent the union between God and his people (Isa. 54:5; Jer. 3:1–14; Hos. 2:9, 20). In the New Testament, the same figure is employed in representing the love of Christ to his saints (Eph. 5:25–27). The Church of the redeemed is the “Bride, the Lamb’s wife” (Rev. 19:7–9).
The Bible declares marriage as the most important relationship one can enter into aside from their relationship with God, and Ephesians 5 gives us perhaps the most detailed explanation of how this plays out. Ephesians 5:22-23 has become among the most controversial passages in Scripture, especially in today’s culture. “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior”. On the surface this appears to suggest that the wife is inferior to the husband - just a submissive servant*(this is not to say the woman is inferior, has no rights, or is to be treated as a second-class person; they must be equal in every decision made in the marriage.). However, as we continue into Ephesians 5:25,28:” Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” In this passage, it is reiterated that in a covenant marriage, the husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the Church and gave himself up for her.

* This goes back to the fall of man, Genesis 3:16, and the curse that fell upon women, “Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.”

In full context, this passage does not present a wife living in submission to a dominant husband. Instead, this is a picture of two people in mutual submission to Christ, and a wife submitting to a godly man who leads the home spiritually and who loves his wife more than he loves himself. As Christ was crucified for the sake of his ‘bride’ the Church, the covenant husband is willing to endure the same for his wife he has given himself to in marriage. This is the most beautiful of love stories. A story of mutual love and submission, of two individuals ever-growing more and more into one, entwined within the love of Christ and for one another.

Covenant marriage has many purposes and meanings, but the primary purpose is to live out the example of the relationship between Christ and His Church. Just as Christ has made an unshakeable, unbreakable covenant with His bride the Church, so we in covenant marriage make the highest commitment to one another. When marriage is not taken as a serious covenant, this is where the trouble comes in. Unhappy marriages that merely ‘keep it together for the kids' or marriages that fail and end in divorce are a result of one or both parties not fully engaging in the covenant. When this happens, it is heartbreaking and leaves deep scars.
In a true covenant, both the husband and wife have set aside themselves for one another and make sacrifices to grow together. In a covenant marriage, grounded in prayer, Scripture, and mutual love, there is always a way to resolve problems, to find forgiveness and respect, and to draw near to one another while drawing near to Christ. The effects of a covenant marriage can extend for generations, providing a blueprint for those who follow us of how to create not just a house but a home where Christ is honored, and people are truly cared for.
 

Mrs.Jeans15

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May 5, 2018
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Oh man, no kidding! I wonder how many marriages have been ****ed up because of texting, snapchat and FB messenger and all that stuff. So easy for people to "start the road" of cheating.
I totally under estimated the internet in the early 2000s.

I would hate to have to find a wife in this environment.

You almost have to give your manhood up to do so....lol
 

Redmich

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Jun 21, 2022
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it is reiterated that in a covenant marriage, the husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the Church and gave himself up for her.
According to your tales Christ came back after 3 days
As far as I’m concerned he basically gave up a long weekend
 

RedMyMind

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Aug 22, 2017
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Most men have no problem being monogamus. It is irresponsible for a man to hting a life into this world tbst they cant support 24 hours a day. Cayse tgats the result of that.

Only men with great resources ever had the oppportunity to have multiple females consistently. The top 10%

Most men can barely get one. Especially now.
Maybe in the future we get a more equal set up when everything isn't about survival. Serial monogamy and if you have kids, you raise them and after they are on their own, off to the next venture.
 

RedMyMind

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Aug 22, 2017
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I will attempt to make this short and simple. I wanted to avoid this part of the conversation, but marriage is a covenant with God.

Marriage as it appears in the Bible, not in modern times or in the ancient Near East and the Graeco-Roman world of biblical times.

The marriage compact is called “the covenant of God” (Prov. 2:17), because the marriage was made in God’s name. The marriage relation is used to represent the union between God and his people (Isa. 54:5; Jer. 3:1–14; Hos. 2:9, 20). In the New Testament, the same figure is employed in representing the love of Christ to his saints (Eph. 5:25–27). The Church of the redeemed is the “Bride, the Lamb’s wife” (Rev. 19:7–9).
The Bible declares marriage as the most important relationship one can enter into aside from their relationship with God, and Ephesians 5 gives us perhaps the most detailed explanation of how this plays out. Ephesians 5:22-23 has become among the most controversial passages in Scripture, especially in today’s culture. “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior”. On the surface this appears to suggest that the wife is inferior to the husband - just a submissive servant*(this is not to say the woman is inferior, has no rights, or is to be treated as a second-class person; they must be equal in every decision made in the marriage.). However, as we continue into Ephesians 5:25,28:” Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” In this passage, it is reiterated that in a covenant marriage, the husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the Church and gave himself up for her.

* This goes back to the fall of man, Genesis 3:16, and the curse that fell upon women, “Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.”

In full context, this passage does not present a wife living in submission to a dominant husband. Instead, this is a picture of two people in mutual submission to Christ, and a wife submitting to a godly man who leads the home spiritually and who loves his wife more than he loves himself. As Christ was crucified for the sake of his ‘bride’ the Church, the covenant husband is willing to endure the same for his wife he has given himself to in marriage. This is the most beautiful of love stories. A story of mutual love and submission, of two individuals ever-growing more and more into one, entwined within the love of Christ and for one another.

Covenant marriage has many purposes and meanings, but the primary purpose is to live out the example of the relationship between Christ and His Church. Just as Christ has made an unshakeable, unbreakable covenant with His bride the Church, so we in covenant marriage make the highest commitment to one another. When marriage is not taken as a serious covenant, this is where the trouble comes in. Unhappy marriages that merely ‘keep it together for the kids' or marriages that fail and end in divorce are a result of one or both parties not fully engaging in the covenant. When this happens, it is heartbreaking and leaves deep scars.
In a true covenant, both the husband and wife have set aside themselves for one another and make sacrifices to grow together. In a covenant marriage, grounded in prayer, Scripture, and mutual love, there is always a way to resolve problems, to find forgiveness and respect, and to draw near to one another while drawing near to Christ. The effects of a covenant marriage can extend for generations, providing a blueprint for those who follow us of how to create not just a house but a home where Christ is honored, and people are truly cared for.
the problem is that if you are wrong in your beliefs, you are stuck from progressing to something potentially better. Like the ole Bo Pelini paradox.
 

RedMyMind

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According to your tales Christ came back after 3 days
As far as I’m concerned he basically gave up a long weekend
and got a promotion.
And 3 days for a supposed deity would be a blink of an eye. And he could numb his pain. People have gone through much worse for nothing.
 

Lincoln100

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Jun 16, 2010
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Even New is very fear based.
Nah. People can read and interpret something in any way they want. If you're scared, and want to find messages of fear, whether or not they exist, you will find them. Take for example your belief that filicide is a "central tenant" of Christianity. Is there some weird breakoff cultish sect claiming to be Christian that advanced that idea? Or, did you come up with that all on your own from interpreting the bible?