Chuck Norris

[steinek11]

I once asked Chuck Norris how many push-ups he could do. He said "all of them". But they're not real push-ups. It would be more accurate to call them Earth downs.

He once stopped a Sherman tank with a roundhouse kick. Made him so mad that he pissed in the gas tank. That was the moment Optimus Prime came to life. True story.

There was a time when Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands. Since then, the locals only refer to them as "the islands"

 

[SkerInCo]

Chuck Norris once had sex with Nicole Kidman, 6 months later she gave birth to a Ford Excursion.

 

[steinek11]

When Chuck Norris found out his daughter had lost her virginity, he went and got it back.

 

[WHCSC]

Chuck Norris isn’t bad enough to post on this board

 

[steinek11]

Chuck Norris has a massive grizzly bear rug in his great room. It's actually not dead. The bear is too afraid to move.

 

[WS Jim Lahey]

Chuck Norris came back from a feminist rally with an ironed shirt and a sandwich

 

[Wyldcard]

Boredom at it's finest! LOL

 

[Antwill]

 

[TheHuskerFreak]

So time traveling to 2007 is possible. Awesome. It was a fun year

 

[RedBaloneyPony]

Chuck Norris sleeps with the lights on because the dark is afraid of him.

 

[Gary.Busey]

I remember telling these Jokes 20 years ago

 

[c3o]

So time traveling to 2007 is possible. Awesome. It was a fun year