::scratch jumps up on to the goal post and encourages fans to drink some ice cold cocolar from the official souvenir cup. We do. He toasts the fans, the fans who helped defeat Louisville and the heisman trophy winner on their own field, the same fans who cheered the football team who had a quarterback tackle hisself in the pocket, and skip a game to take the bar exam. His tone grows sterner, more apathetic. Fans begin coughing in the stands. He toasts to the fans who watched a conference USA player cuck their favorite team on national television, in prime time. Fans are now vomiting blood. He continues, toasting the same fans who joyfully exaulted when they thought Tim Tebow had died on our believed CM newton field. The faithful are now mostly dead in the stands, those who sit in the upper deck are flailing over the new seat backs and landing on the loge roof. Scratch pans the scene and slowly removes his head. It's Arya Stark. She turns to Mitch Barnhart. "When they ask what happened here, tell them it was the folks from big *** fans. They really wanted those dang naming rights."
[a male cheer leader takes the mega phone] ITS FOOOOOOTBALLL TIIIIMMMME IN THE BLUUUEEGRASSSSSSSS