Let's see. Over the last, what? 18-20 months. Here are your narratives:
-there is NO investigation
-there IS an investigation in women's basketball and track
-there is NO football NOA
-there IS a NOA but only 3 minor football violations
-there are only 8 minor football violations
-there is nothing implicating the current staff
-the only thing on current staff is Tunsil's step-dad (he'll rue the day)
-nothing implicates Hugh Freeze
-the investigatiotn is over
-no coaches have hired outside counsel
-EXEMPLARY COOPERATION
-no boosters have been disassociated
-The NCAA has commended Ole Miss on how professional they have been which will be taken into account.
-They are eager to release their side of the story
-They self-reported most of these violations
-Texas firing Chris Vaughn is ABSOLUTELY NOT related to Ole Miss
-Steve Robertson has been calling Ole Miss recruits and claiming to be NCAA enforcement (he'll rue the day)
-OléMiss will sue Steve (he'll rue the day
-OPPORTUNITY FUND
-FBI is investigating whoever hacked Tunsil's phone (you'll rue the day)
-It's a baseless witch hunt
-Larry Templeton is involved in all of this (he'll rue the day)
-The investigation was over until the draft night fiasco
-Ole Miss investigating Steve Robertson (he'll rue the day)
-Freeze told Finebaum that he would fire any coach that was caught in impropriety
-Only 9 scholarship losses over 3 years' probation
-NCAA has accepted the self-imposed penalties, 11 scholarships over 3 years
-The ridiculous NCAA just keeps investigating until they find something
-Steve Robertson has received a subpoena in a defamation suit (rue the day, I tell you)
-OléMiss has told the NCAA that they wouldn't cooperate any more
-OléMiss is actually suing the NCAA for... excessive enforcement. (they'll rue the day)
-There is NO 2nd NOA or addendum
-Barney Farrar didn't do anything wrong
-MSU (and Alabama, Auburn, Georgia, etc) was told not to play this game because OléMiss has MOUNTAINS of evidence against them (they'll rue the day)
-OléMiss has evidence of Jeffrey Simmons getting paid (he'll rue the day)
-Barney has been cleared and will be reinstated
-MSU is now being investigated (they'll rue the day)
-OléMiss has VIDEO recording of Leo Lewis asking them to match MSU's offer of $80k (he'll rue the day)
-Chuck Rounsaville has AUDIO recording of Leo Lewis asking them to match MSU's offer of $80k
-Leo Lewis is suspended for the Egg Bowl because of violations (6 tackles, 1 sack)
-MSU will receive a NOA
-OléMiss fired all of these coaches for going 5-7; not because of the NCAA investigation
-John Farley is Rosebowl's "source" (he'll rue the day)
-Cam Akers will sign with OléMiss
-NCAA has accepted the self-imposed penalties
-NCAA won't hit OléMiss hard because of Baylor
-NO chance of a bowl ban. None.
-There has NOT been a second letter delivered, we know a guy.
-The NCAA can't find where we bought any players, so they're using minor stuff to punish us.
-There is ABSOLUTELY NO instance of paying recruits.
-Committee On Infractions can see how much OléMiss has suffered already, so they'll go easy and "be fair".
-Some of these charges the NCAA can't prove, they just included them hoping that a few will stick.
-This is all Leo Lewis' fault. (He'll rue the day)
-OléMiss media is about to release the Leo video... any minute now.
-NCAA is reviewing the Leo Lewis tape.
-Leo Lewis family has had to hire an attorney! (He'll rue the day)
-LEO LEWIS TAPES!!!
-This whole thing is a conspiracy by the NCAA, Greg Sankey, Larry Templeton, Greg Byrne, Scott Stricklin, Nick Saban, Dan Mullen, John Cohen, Rosebowl, etc. BUT we have the goods and will take them all down (They'll rue the day)
-Freeze is absolutely NOT resigning, getting suspension, or show cause!
-After this is over, we have plans in place that will expose the NCAA corruption (rue the day)
-Leo Lewis was suspended from the Spring Game (because that happens in real life)
-Leo Lewis is in so much trouble it's not even funny (rue)
-Leo Lewis was inaccurate about something, so nothing he says can be used against Ole Miss (rue)
-NCAA is gonna nail MSU who will be a repeat offender because Will Redmond (rue)
-Greg Sankey and Larry Templeton are the most powerful figures in sports; they run the SEC AND the NCAA (rue)
-Rosebowl is a liar; a Black Bear coach did NOT meet a recruit along with a booster after the 2nd NOA.
-Rosebowl's complaint to the ethics commission has no merit and will be tossed out.
-In light of Rosebowl's favorable ruling by the ethics commission, we won.
-Dan Mullen schemed a plan having Leo Lewis and Kobe Jones contact the NCAA, take immunity, and lie to the NCAA (rue)
-Kobe Jones has confessed to the NCAA that his testimony under immunity was false (rue)
-Even though we have disassociated over a dozen boosters, we admit that our assistant coaches committed level 1 violations, we admit that multiple coaches set up meetings with multiple boosters, we admit we fixed ACT scores, our head coach is named in half a dozen or more violations, and the majority of this stuff happened while we knew we were under NCAA investigation.... I'm sorry what were we talking about?
-An MSU booster really gave Leo Lewis that money, Dan Mullen made him lie and say it was from the Landsharks (rue)
-Leo Lewis will be ineligible for 2017, and have to finish at Jackson State (rue)
-All of Rosebowl's posts and podcasts have been accumulated and an epic defamation case is being mounted against him (rue)
-Matthew McConaughey & Sandra Bulloch are renting a house in Oxford because it's so awesome and they are excited that Texas might come back.
-You'll all roux the day... I mean rue.
-there is NO investigation
-there IS an investigation in women's basketball and track
-there is NO football NOA
-there IS a NOA but only 3 minor football violations
-there are only 8 minor football violations
-there is nothing implicating the current staff
-the only thing on current staff is Tunsil's step-dad (he'll rue the day)
-nothing implicates Hugh Freeze
-the investigatiotn is over
-no coaches have hired outside counsel
-EXEMPLARY COOPERATION
-no boosters have been disassociated
-The NCAA has commended Ole Miss on how professional they have been which will be taken into account.
-They are eager to release their side of the story
-They self-reported most of these violations
-Texas firing Chris Vaughn is ABSOLUTELY NOT related to Ole Miss
-Steve Robertson has been calling Ole Miss recruits and claiming to be NCAA enforcement (he'll rue the day)
-OléMiss will sue Steve (he'll rue the day
-OPPORTUNITY FUND
-FBI is investigating whoever hacked Tunsil's phone (you'll rue the day)
-It's a baseless witch hunt
-Larry Templeton is involved in all of this (he'll rue the day)
-The investigation was over until the draft night fiasco
-Ole Miss investigating Steve Robertson (he'll rue the day)
-Freeze told Finebaum that he would fire any coach that was caught in impropriety
-Only 9 scholarship losses over 3 years' probation
-NCAA has accepted the self-imposed penalties, 11 scholarships over 3 years
-The ridiculous NCAA just keeps investigating until they find something
-Steve Robertson has received a subpoena in a defamation suit (rue the day, I tell you)
-OléMiss has told the NCAA that they wouldn't cooperate any more
-OléMiss is actually suing the NCAA for... excessive enforcement. (they'll rue the day)
-There is NO 2nd NOA or addendum
-Barney Farrar didn't do anything wrong
-MSU (and Alabama, Auburn, Georgia, etc) was told not to play this game because OléMiss has MOUNTAINS of evidence against them (they'll rue the day)
-OléMiss has evidence of Jeffrey Simmons getting paid (he'll rue the day)
-Barney has been cleared and will be reinstated
-MSU is now being investigated (they'll rue the day)
-OléMiss has VIDEO recording of Leo Lewis asking them to match MSU's offer of $80k (he'll rue the day)
-Chuck Rounsaville has AUDIO recording of Leo Lewis asking them to match MSU's offer of $80k
-Leo Lewis is suspended for the Egg Bowl because of violations (6 tackles, 1 sack)
-MSU will receive a NOA
-OléMiss fired all of these coaches for going 5-7; not because of the NCAA investigation
-John Farley is Rosebowl's "source" (he'll rue the day)
-Cam Akers will sign with OléMiss
-NCAA has accepted the self-imposed penalties
-NCAA won't hit OléMiss hard because of Baylor
-NO chance of a bowl ban. None.
-There has NOT been a second letter delivered, we know a guy.
-The NCAA can't find where we bought any players, so they're using minor stuff to punish us.
-There is ABSOLUTELY NO instance of paying recruits.
-Committee On Infractions can see how much OléMiss has suffered already, so they'll go easy and "be fair".
-Some of these charges the NCAA can't prove, they just included them hoping that a few will stick.
-This is all Leo Lewis' fault. (He'll rue the day)
-OléMiss media is about to release the Leo video... any minute now.
-NCAA is reviewing the Leo Lewis tape.
-Leo Lewis family has had to hire an attorney! (He'll rue the day)
-LEO LEWIS TAPES!!!
-This whole thing is a conspiracy by the NCAA, Greg Sankey, Larry Templeton, Greg Byrne, Scott Stricklin, Nick Saban, Dan Mullen, John Cohen, Rosebowl, etc. BUT we have the goods and will take them all down (They'll rue the day)
-Freeze is absolutely NOT resigning, getting suspension, or show cause!
-After this is over, we have plans in place that will expose the NCAA corruption (rue the day)
-Leo Lewis was suspended from the Spring Game (because that happens in real life)
-Leo Lewis is in so much trouble it's not even funny (rue)
-Leo Lewis was inaccurate about something, so nothing he says can be used against Ole Miss (rue)
-NCAA is gonna nail MSU who will be a repeat offender because Will Redmond (rue)
-Greg Sankey and Larry Templeton are the most powerful figures in sports; they run the SEC AND the NCAA (rue)
-Rosebowl is a liar; a Black Bear coach did NOT meet a recruit along with a booster after the 2nd NOA.
-Rosebowl's complaint to the ethics commission has no merit and will be tossed out.
-In light of Rosebowl's favorable ruling by the ethics commission, we won.
-Dan Mullen schemed a plan having Leo Lewis and Kobe Jones contact the NCAA, take immunity, and lie to the NCAA (rue)
-Kobe Jones has confessed to the NCAA that his testimony under immunity was false (rue)
-Even though we have disassociated over a dozen boosters, we admit that our assistant coaches committed level 1 violations, we admit that multiple coaches set up meetings with multiple boosters, we admit we fixed ACT scores, our head coach is named in half a dozen or more violations, and the majority of this stuff happened while we knew we were under NCAA investigation.... I'm sorry what were we talking about?
-An MSU booster really gave Leo Lewis that money, Dan Mullen made him lie and say it was from the Landsharks (rue)
-Leo Lewis will be ineligible for 2017, and have to finish at Jackson State (rue)
-All of Rosebowl's posts and podcasts have been accumulated and an epic defamation case is being mounted against him (rue)
-Matthew McConaughey & Sandra Bulloch are renting a house in Oxford because it's so awesome and they are excited that Texas might come back.
-You'll all roux the day... I mean rue.
